In a Crossway article entitled, “Three Ways Men Can Love Their Wives in Real Life”, Kevin De Young sums up his points with three verbs. (Men, this is mostly for you, but anyone can instill this in our children.) Here’s a condensed summary.
1.Lead 2.Sacrifice 3.Care
Lead. Take the initiative without making every decision. When you say, “Let’s do _____,” you show eagerness and engagement. LISTEN to your wives. Take responsibility for the spiritual well-being of your family. God is holding you accountable. Take initiative to repair any breach.
Sacrifice. “You need to understand the doctrine of the atonement. Jesus died for the church. Your leadership as a husband is a self-sacrificing leadership. This can mean little things: coming home early, taking care of the kids, participating joyfully in something she likes to do, overlooking an offense, running errands, fixing something around the house, cleaning up the house. Loving your wife can also entail bigger sacrifices.” (Climbing the corporate ladder, giving up your own hopes or dreams, living at a lower lifestyle.)
Care. “Finally, husbands, care for your wives. Cherish her as your own body (Eph. 5:28). She is not merely your partner. She is your other half, your own flesh and bone. You don’t abuse your body; you build up, protect, and nourish it. Likewise, cherish and care for your wife. “Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them” (Col. 3:19). Take care of her needs for food, clothing, and security.
Our young men can be the next generation to lead, sacrifice and care. Our young women can be taught what to look for in godly men and what to expect before committing to a relationship. Can I get an amen?