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Debra Wallace

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“Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.”  Ephesians 4:32 NASB

In one of Beth Moore’s Instagram posts she says, “The brutal irony of un-forgiveness is, it keeps us bound to the very people we most want to be free of.  They are roped to our backs and go everywhere we go.  Forgiveness is not a feeling. It’s a freedom.  It’s coming into agreement with God to cut them loose and put them in His hands.”

I have to agree forgiveness is something we do for ourselves.  It doesn’t depend on our feelings but rather it’s based on our obedience to God.  God’s word encourages us to forgive.  It is by God’s grace shown to us, and through the power of the Holy Spirit, that we are even able to truly forgive someone.  It’s a divine act. When we forgive, then God can work in our life to accomplish the purposes He has for us.  We can have freedom. We are no longer imprisoned by holding onto our anger, resentment, or desire to get even.  There are many things that remind me of the unacceptable ways I’ve been treated.  I could continue to build up anger and resentment every time these thoughts cross my mind.  It’s a battle, but when I am triggered to re-live the bad portions of my marriage or deal with ongoing issues, I have to simply tell myself God is handling it.  He is the one in control, and I no longer need to worry or concern myself with those  issues.  I try to release it and move on, because it’s a heavy burden to bear–God doesn’t want us to carry it anyway! 

This is what He speaks of in Matthew 11:28-30 NASB. 

“Come unto Me all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.  Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

Forgiving seems to get easier as time goes on, but I still have my moments of anger or disappointment.  (The enemy constantly tries to get me back to an area of un-forgiveness.) He works to steal peace and joy by tempting us to return to the past hurts instead of welcoming our new hope and future.

Romans 12:19 says, “Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine. I will repay,’ says the Lord.”

I need to daily, sometimes hourly, (even minute by minute!) call on the Holy Spirit to help me. He gives me the strength to forgive, but forgiveness is still a choice. To please God and to be in obedience to him, we must choose to forgive and place our circumstances back in Jesus’ hands. There’s freedom in forgiveness. Is there someone you need to forgive? Choose it for yourself, today. Repeat after me…There’s freedom in forgiveness.

11 comments on “Forgiveness–Really? Do I have to?

  1. Susan Record says:

    Debra, thank you for this post and reminding us of the benefit of forgiveness. God is so good and everything He asks of us is for our own good and His glory. What a powerful testimony of His grace through your story of forgiveness! Thank you for sharing.
    ” it was for freedom that Christ set us free.” Gal 5:1

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you for the comment. Hope you are doing well, Susan. Praying for you. 🙏😍


  2. rlcljc says:

    That truth is So important!! We must continually live out the gospel message of grace.
    We don’t deserve God’s forgiveness, yet He has lavished us with it!


    1. Although I know forgiveness is part of healing, it is extremely difficult to forgive when one is still in the middle of trauma, so it’s important to be patient with those who are working towards it. It can’t be rushed or forced, I’m realizing. Everyone has their own way of coming to a point of forgiveness, and that’s ok. In the middle of forgiving, one is also trying to find a place of feeling safe again. It all takes time!


  3. Mary says:

    I am so blessed to have read your article on forgiveness today. Thank you for this friendly reminder where I was encouraged to make a forgiveness phone call. In return I received the Peace and Joy I had been longing for all day. Praise God!!! There’s Freedom in forgiveness!!! Thank You Beautiful Blessed Woman of God!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so glad you found it helpful. You are a blessing to me.


  4. Walking the pathway of forgiveness is hard. But ultimately it is the only way to be free of the past. Perhaps it’s really a mercy when Jesus tells us to forgive as He forgave us.


    1. I agree. Sometimes the offender doesn’t see the need for an apology if they haven’t taken responsibility, but forgiveness will release us from resentment. Forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean reconciliation, but you become free to move on with a peace. Thank you for reading my posts!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes. Sometimes reconciliation is neither possible nor best for the person who’s been hurt. And I agree with you 100%. You don’t want your ability to live a full life and, ultimately, your future to be determined by another individual, or the feelings that you harbour against them.


  5. Good post, Debra.
    No, we don’t HAVE to, we GET to. 😉


  6. KINDNESS says:


    Liked by 1 person

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